As we evolve, so have our perceptions, views, and attitudes toward relationships and marriages. This has paved the way for new forms of partnerships to emerge from time to time. One such association in this category is platonic marriages — a different and conflicting take on matrimony that is usually envisioned as two people coming together to love, cherish, and be physically intimate with one another. However, platonic couples create their own rules and dynamics that benefit the both of them, but more on that later.

Let’s take a moment at how platonic relationships came into being.The term “platonic” is derived from the name of the Greek philosopher Plato. It was initially used to mock non-sexual relationships because people used to think it was ridiculous to separate sex from love. Eventually, this feeling evaporated as people started believing in the idea of romantic attachment where you get emotional support without any sexual expectations or favors. 

What Is Platonic Marriage?

In simple terms, a platonic marriage refers to a marital relationship in which both the partners have an emotional and companionship bond but do not engage in sexual intimacy. To be precise, they share a home but not a sexual relationship. 

This doesn’t imply that they aren’t in love. They do love their partner but as best friends. They live as good friends who deeply care for one another but do not share anything beyond a quick hug or a peck on the cheek.

What’s more is that this type of a relationship can take place between heterosexual partners, pansexual partners, and in same sex relationships as well. It’s just that they don’t have sexual desires for one another. In fact, they are more common than you think. The New York Times reported that about 15% of married couples don’t engage in sex, which means they have practical love between them but not physical.

This doesn’t mean there is sexual incompatibility between them.Or they are not in a romantic relationship. It’s just that they choose to remain as platonic spouses. Their legal union helps them connect with each other on a deeper level and they are honest and loyal with one another. 

Types Of Platonic Marriages

Now that you know what a platonic marriage means. Read along and find out the types of platonic relationships and marriages: 

  • Bromance: When two men share a deep, affectionate, and loving relationship with one another without the element of sexual attraction, it’s known as bromance
  • Womance: Similarly, when two women have a strong bond without dragging the angle of sexual or romantic love between them, it’s known as womance
  • Work spouse: When you have a colleague with whom you share a wonderful bond, then they could be your work spouse

Platonic relationships also require serious commitment. Just because you aren’t having sex with your platonic partner doesn’t mean you will sleep around and have fun. In a platonic marriage too, you need to be as committed to your partner as one is in a romantic relationship.

If you want to live in an open marriage or be involved physically with other people,  you can talk to your partner about it first and then proceed with their permission. This is just one of the benefits of a platonic marriage. Take a look at seven more.

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What Are The Benefits Of A Platonic Marriage?

Living together as friends and living together as platonic spouses are two sides of the same coin. When you and your partner live in a platonic marriage, you could avail many benefits from such a partnership. The advantages include:

1. Less stress

One of the main benefits of a platonic relationship is that it can lessen your stress, anxiety, and other mental health issues owing to the fact that platonic spouses have someone to talk to. They can come home after a hectic day and unwind without the fear of being judged. You can release your pent-up feelings with them and vice versa. 

2. Lifelong companionship 

Platonic marriage isn’t just wearing wedding gowns and saying “I do”. You have to diligently follow all the platonic marriage rules and keep one another happy, you get a deep sense of companionship and emotional support. 

The platonic couples in such a marriage often develop a strong friendship and rely on each other for understanding, encouragement, and comfort. Platonic love is characterized b a strong sense of affection for each other, minus the sexual desires. You have someone who will never talk bad about you or betray you. They will always be your cheerleader. 

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3. Financial stability and security 

There are numerous reasons why romance fades in a marriage. But that doesn’t mean you will leave your partner. And when you choose to live with someone as friends while co-parenting your kids, it can be easier to navigate financial problems. This is one of the biggest financial benefits of living together instead of getting a divorce. You can split expenses and revel in the perks of insurance benefits, legal benefits, and other social security benefits.

This way, a platonic couple can maintain stability and security in their lives. They may continue to share living arrangements, financial responsibilities, and household tasks, providing a sense of stability and continuity in their day-to-day lives. 

Furthermore, they can also have a platonic open marriage where they agree to meet other people and form relationships outside of this dynamic with each other’s knowledge and agreement. 

4. Shared life and goals

Jealousy in relationships is not unheard of. Platonic marriages are perfect to experience contentment and satisfaction pursuing your goals with a partner who is supportive. There is no competition and your platonic partner wants to see you achieve your dream in life. 

Platonic spouses do not get jealous of their partner’s success and growth.They support and cheer you every step of the way,

In addition to that, if you and your platonic partner have children together, then sharing a life with them will make your life easier. You can raise children with much more ease as you have your partner’s support. Your family life will be smoother and you can co parent while living under the same roof. 

5. Family and social acceptance 

How does society view intimacy? As long as couples display affection and love in public, everyone praises them and thinks highly of them. Traditional marriages thrive on this one concept.

On the contrary, how does society view divorce? As a taboo in most countries. A societal stigma. People would rather suffer in silence than get a divorce. However, when you start living with each other as friends and sort out your differences, you will have a happy life and the society won’t look down upon you.

This in no way implies that you have to live in an unhappy marriage. You can walk out any time you want. But since certain cultural or religious communities may place a strong emphasis on the institution of marriage. That’s why many platonic spouses choose to live in such an arrangement as a means to conform to societal expectations or maintain harmonious relationships with family and friends.

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6. Steer clear of post-divorce consequences 

Some people aren’t financially or emotionally equipped to handle the aftermath of a divorce. Hence, this is one of the numerous reasons why they choose to stay in such a relationship. They get to avoid potential negative consequences that may accompany divorce, such as financial complications, division of assets, custody battles, or legal proceedings.

If your partner shares the same vision as you, then it can offer a way to maintain a certain level of stability and avoid potential emotional or logistical challenges associated with divorce. You can choose to date or fall in love outside of your marriage while avoiding all these problems. 

7. You feel accepted 

Think of this relationship as an exclusive club that consists of only two people who love one another just as they are. They have accepted each other with all their flaws and imperfections. You can be your true self without trying to mask your real identity. This is exactly what happens in romantic relationships. People put on masks and become a different person just because they want to impress them. 

is a platonic marriage right for you

How To Know If A Platonic Marriage Is Right For You?

Deciding whether a platonic marriage is right for you is a deeply personal and individual choice. Here are some considerations that may help you determine if a platonic marriage aligns with your needs and values:

1. Honest self-reflection 

Try to have an honest self-reflection. You can do so by following the below steps:

  • Take time to reflect on your own desires, needs, and expectations for a marriage
  • Consider whether you prioritize emotional connection, companionship, and shared goals over sexual intimacy
  • Assess your own comfort level and ability to maintain a platonic relationship in the long term

2. Communication and mutual understanding 

If you are wondering if such a dynamic would suit your relationship, engage in an open and honest communication with your partner. It’s a wonderful feeling to discuss your thoughts, feelings, and desires with someone you trust and rely on. Once you feel that you both have a shared understanding of what it means and what each of you expects from the relationship, perhaps you can see if it’s right for you by trying it out. 

3. Compatibility

Assess the compatibility of your values, goals, and expectations with your partner. How is your connection with each other as married partners? All kinds of attachment including emotional, intellectual, and spiritual connection.

Also, you need to ensure that you have shared interests, committed friendships, and a strong emotional bond that can sustain a platonic marriage. Evaluate whether you can meet each other’s needs for companionship and emotional support without relying on sexual intimacy.

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4. Intimacy alternatives 

Consider how you will address the lack of sexual intimacy in your relationship if you and your partner aren’t asexuals. Discuss and explore alternative forms of intimacy that can meet your emotional and physical needs.

Talk about how you can satisfy each other’s sexual hunger without engaging in intercourse. This may involve finding other ways to connect emotionally and engage in non-sexual physical touch, or express affection.

5. Support system

Evaluate the potential impact of a platonic marriage on your social support system. Try to talk to your best friend or a trusted family member about this and get to know their opinions. This is essential because you need to ensure that you have a network of people who understand and respect your choice.

It is essential to remember that the decision to pursue a platonic marriage should be made with careful thought and consideration. It may also be helpful to seek guidance from a therapist or counselor who can provide support and help you navigate this decision-making process. 

Key Takeaways

  • Attitudes surrounding marriage and romantic relationships are continuously evolving. One such dynamics is platonic relationship/marriage where two people are life partners but they do not have sexual feelings or engage in sexual intercourse
  • Some of the benefits of this legal union include lesser stress, financial perks, and economic advantages
  • You can find out if this will be the right choice for you by having an open communication with your partner and by determining whether you are compatible enough to live such a life

Ultimately, the choice to be with a platonic partner should be based on the unique needs, desires, and circumstances of both the parties involved, which should allow them to find fulfillment and happiness in their chosen relationship arrangement. 

FAQs

1. Is platonic marriage normal?

Yes. It’s as normal as any other marriage. As long as two people are happy in this dynamic, then nothing is abnormal or worrisome. 

2. Can a platonic marriage work? 

Yes. Such marriages can work when partners promise to be honest with one another and communicate effectively if and when something goes wrong. And just as with any other marriage, you need to accept, acknowledge, and love your partner for who they are.