Is your Instagram flooded with pictures of people getting engaged or married or simply basking in romance? And you were about to post that lone Cup of Joe when it hits you : Am I going to be single forever?

Let’s not take this as a big deal. It’s totally fine to stay single. You know, Sansa Stark from Game of Thrones remained single. She didn’t get her happily-ever-after but she became the queen of the North. Also, Joey Tribbiani from the OG show FRIENDS got his heart broken by Rachel and didn’t get his happy ending either. So, just because you don’t see yourself getting into a committed relationship like the rest of the herd, that doesn’t mean you are miserable in life.

It just means you are focusing on yourself and making yourself and your dreams a priority. In fact, you will be surprised to know that you aren’t alone in this category.

According to a recent research, 69% of American adults are partnered, whereas 31% remain single. And half of these single people are happy being single forever, and they are not l currently looking for any serious relationship, or going on dates to meet new people.

Yes, if you have tried and things did not work out for you, it could be hard to accept that you are going to be single for the rest of your life. Perhaps, relationships are not for you.

Or maybe, there were other pressing things- like career, family responsibilities, some major life change and that has led you to a ‘single forever’ status.

Or, perhaps you have set too high standards for your better half, or you are someone who has unrealistic expectations from your partner.

Whatever the case may be, the signs below will help you introspect your single status- and identify whether there is something you’d like to change. And if staying single is your thing, then we have some tips to ensure you feel happy and celebrate your solo status.

After like a hundred heartbreaks and disappointments, you have started wondering if you are going to stay single forever. L

18 Signs You Might Stay Single Forever

So there is an imaginary deadline at play, and you at times cry in your bathroom because you feel alone. Well, not entirely because you are at peace with your singledom, but there is that constant pressure you feel at times. You wonder if you might stay single forever, and we are here to make you aware of the signs that indicate you will, atleast for the time being. Being single and living a fulfilling life is for you, if you feel the below resonates with you.

1. You enjoy being on your own 

So you are asking, “Am I going to be alone forever?” If you have no desire to be in a relationship even after reaching the age of 40, it’s obvious you enjoy being on your own. This just means you enjoy your own company and you are comfortable living a “solitary” life. That’s the crucial word here. You don’t feel lonely or feel sad about your situation.

Nevertheless, you love your solitude and you feel content. You think that’s the best way to live your life. And, you do you because if that’s what makes you happy, then no societal pressure or stigma should stop you from living life on your own terms. 

2. You don’t feel FOMO 

Most of the people who are single look at couples and think that they are missing out on love, romance, and intimacy. They feel massive fomo which makes them anxious and depressed. Furthermore, it makes them desperate to find true love.

On the other hand, if this feeling seems peculiar or bizarre to you, then congratulations! You don’t have that nagging and anxiety-inducing fear of missing out. You are the real boss here because your life isn’t fuelled by envy and jealousy.

You are always in high spirits regardless of a significant other’s presence or absence. Inner peace, and what more does one wat, right?

3. You enjoy your freedom

Freedom is hands down one of the biggest benefits of being single. You have a carefree life. You can do whatever you want and nobody can stop you. Nobody nags you to do the dishes or take out the garbage.

You have basically figured yourself out and you are living in deep satisfaction. You know your self-worth and you don’t want anything (or anyone) to threaten that. 

Some other signs you enjoy your free time and freedom include:

  • You aren’t glued to social media 
  • You can go without scrolling Instagram for days at a stretch 
  • You even turn your phone off
  • Your private time and life is all yours, you do not feel compelled to share ‘your’ things with anyone
  • You can cook, clean, and look after yourself on your own 

4. You have commitment phobia 

If you want to find love but the thought of marriage, children, and commitment scares the bejesus out of you, then there are chances you have a deep seated fear of commitment. This gamophobia can sometimes give you anxiety about being single forever.

Signs of commitment phobia include:

  • A fear of feeling trapped
  • Questioning the relationship as soon as you feel it is turning serious
  • Never planning the future of your relationship
  • Not feeling emotionally attached with the other person
  • Fear of being in a wrong relationship or being with a wrong person

The reason for this fear could stem from various reasons including a bad breakup, having seen your parents or other married people going through an ugly divorce, fear of abandonment, or any other traumatic event.

You fear commitment but if you don’t like the idea of being eternally single, then you can seek professional help and deal with it for the sake of your mental health and happiness. 

You May Also Like: How To Stop Wanting A Relationship: 15 Strategies For Finding Contentment

5. You think nobody can live up to your standards 

They say it is better to be single with high standards than being in a relationship settling for less. And if this is your mantra, then perhaps you will love staying single forever owing to the fact that you don’t want to adjust or live a life of mediocrity. Furthermore, having high standards is also a form of self-care and self-respect.

It just means you won’t tolerate people or behavior who can’t and won’t meet your standards. It’s not a toxic trait unless it starts taking a toll on your mental wellness. As long as you see this in a positive light and it makes you feel self-sufficient, you are good to go. 

You are willing to wait longer, and are also not averse to the idea to remain single forever.

6. You have trust issues 

One of the glaring signs of being single forever is when you have over the top trust issues and this suspicion and distrust can become a barrier when you try to find love. It may make you averse to love and relationships because you are worried about getting your heart broken by someone you fall for. Ergo, you would rather embrace the single life forever than give the right person a chance. 

If you don’t want to stay single forever, then you need to deal with your trust issues first. Take your time getting over the things that left you heartbroken and damaged. Practice self-care and work on your social interaction.

Once you meet someone new, you can communicate with them and tell them your issues and then navigate together from there. 

Being single forever

7. You dislike the dating concept 

There are two types of people in the world: people who go out there, socialize, and meet people whom they want to casually date. And there are people who directly want to jump to the commitment phase.

If you belong to the latter category, then there are chances you have a difficult time managing your heart desires as not a lot of people will share your thinking.

Most people want to take it slow. They don’t want to rush and jump into a relationship. You can try to get out of this situation by downloading dating apps and hanging out with people as friends.

Once you are sure a person is right for you, talk to them about your dislike for the whole dating scene. Communicate freely about your dislikes and see the future could possibly hold for you. 

You May Also Like: 11 Online Dating Red Flags You Should Never Ignore

8. Your career is your priority 

Are you a travel blogger? A secret spy? Doing a Master’s degree that is time-consuming? Or just a workaholic who drowns themselves in work day in and day out? Or perhaps your work is more fulfilling than your romantic interests. You crave financial independence, so your work always scores above your personal life.

Or you have priortized your personal growth and self-discovery than being in a relationship with someone. You’re not worried about being single forever, you believe God has charted your path differently and you are happy the way it is

Whatever the reason is, your work, self-love, or personal growth, it takes priority in your life and you want to give it your 100%.

This is one of the benefits of being single as you don’t have anyone to distract you from your goals. With just you in the picture, everything is possible even if you have crossed your 50s. Age doesn’t matter when you are determined to stay single and achieve your dreams. 

9. You enjoy one-night-stands more than commitment 

If you are a serial dater and love one-night stands more than steady relationships, then you will be happy living a single life. The “single lifestyle” seems more appealing to you than being stuck in a committed relationship.

You like to have fun without any strings attached, which is good for you! It’s all good and healthy as long as the person you spend the night with knows you are not looking for a serious relationship.

10. You fear being controlled

When a person perceives a loss of control over their own actions, thoughts, or decisions, that’s when they prefer staying single forever after divorce or even if they just generally don’t like the idea of being controlled. You don’t want to be controlled by anyone else.

Hence, you take back the control of your life by cutting all ties with your partner. However, if you have a fear of being single forever, it’s better to release that fear and strengthen your relationship. 

Thinking am i going to be alone forever

11. You aren’t able to get over your ex

Breakups can be painful. You imagined your life with them yet here you are. Heartbroken and reminiscing about your first date with them. But what’s done is done.

Most relationships in life come with an expiry date. You can’t be stuck in the past and expect a life where you are living happily in the present. You need to move on for your own. It doesn’t matter if you think being single sucks or if you don’t find any perks of being single. Here are some ways you can get over your ex:

  • Cut all communication and establish a no-contact rule
  • Forgive the past regardless of whose fault it was
  • Come to a breakup closure 
  • Understand that it’s natural to miss them once in a while but it’s not natural to sulk over their memories
  • Remind yourself that you deserve better 

You May Also Like: 33 Breakup Affirmations To Help You Heal And Move On

12. You don’t know what you want 

Healthy relationships seem to confuse you and you don’t know what you want. Your feelings about long-term relationships are jumbled up and you also fear rejection. It’s like you meet someone and you don’t know why you aren’t able to confess your feelings. Plus, you don’t know how to understand a person’s feelings and you don’t know what you want from them. 

If this is the problem with you but you don’t like the idea of staying single forever, it’s better you jot down the things you are looking for in a person and the things you are seeking from romantic relationships. 

13. You fear losing your identity in a relationship 

Every time you have been in a relationship, you lose yourself. You become someone else. You either become accommodating and adjusting or you act like you are better than them and deserve to be worshiped. Neither of these is your personality, essence, and character.

Alternatively, perhaps you loved your former partner so much that you made them the center of your universe. You stopped pursuing your dreams because you wanted to support theirs. You put your life on hold for your partner.

If any of these instances ring a bell, it’s obvious you fear losing yourself in a relationship and perhaps that’s why you think it’s better to stay single than lose your self-esteem. 

14. Your friends and family are more important 

You have a large group of friends and a big family who have supported you and cared for you. They have taken a huge chunk of your life and you don’t think you want another person to hog the remaining chunk of you. Hence, you think it’s wise to live life by being eternally single. 

Innfographic to signs you might stay single forever
Signs you may stay single forever

15. You are not an expressive person 

This is honestly something I have struggled with my whole life. For all I know, this is the answer to my question, “Am I going to be alone forever?”. I have a very difficult time expressing my feelings. I don’t know how to show care or love.

If you are in the same boat as me, then maybe you think nobody will ever understand you and no relationship will ever fulfill you if your perfect partner can’t even understand you. Therefore, you decide to be content on your own, and being single for life seems like a good idea rather than feeling miserable in a relationship. 

16. You have low self-esteem 

One of the reasons why you have crossed your 40s and still think it’s wise to stay single is because you have low self-confidence and low self-esteem. You look down upon yourself and think you aren’t a good match for anyone. You have learnt to utilize your alone time in a better way and feel sufficient on your own. 

If you don’t want to be in this situation, then you need to know how to increase your self-worth. You need to stop being critical of yourself and comparing yourself to others.

A relationship means two people who see each other’s flaws and love them anyway. So, when you find the right person, they will understand your esteem issues and won’t do anything to trigger them. 

You May Also Like: Your Guide To Setting Healthy Dating Boundaries

17. You don’t like sharing your space with someone

Most single people tend to hate the idea of sharing their space with someone else. They want to live alone because they consider sharing space as a personal loss.

On the contrary, if you want to overcome this problem, then you need to grow in life and become an emotionally mature person.

You need to know that living together with someone doesn’t mean you have to be joined at the hip all the time. You can love someone, live with them, and raise children with them while giving each other the space and alone time to do what you want and what they want. 

18. You have sky high expectations 

No, it’s not the same as having high standards which we already have already covered. Standards is what you want in a partner, such as humor, looks, and wealth among other things, whereas expectations is what you want to happen in the future.

Perhaps you think nobody can live up to their expectations and that’s why you wonder if anyone will ever live up to them. 

You expected your partner to do something but they failed to do so because of some reason. There you are. Disappointed, hurt, angry, and thinking they don’t deserve you. So, if you have sky high expectations, it’s one of the signs you are going to be single forever. 

signs he will never marry you
Image by yanalya on Freepik

How To Stay Happy Being Single

If you have decided you will forever stay single or if this phase is just a passing cloud, you need to learn how to sail through it in a happy way. Some people are naturally happy about their situation and they have learnt how to master the art of being single. However, if you are new to this area or if you have stayed in this stage a little longer than usual and finding it hard to stay happy, here are some helpful tips:

  • Avoid comparing your life to other people’s lives 
  • Take a break from social media 
  • Don’t let negative thoughts trump over positive ones
  • Indulge in some self-care. For example, read a book, buy something for yourself, have a spa day, or treat yourself to a big meal
  • Spend time in nature
  • Travel solo 
  • Nurture other relationships in your life
  • Follow a healthy diet and start working out regularly 

Whatever your reason behind staying single is, celebrate it. Accept it. Learn to live with it. Nothing else matters as long as your life is peaceful and your mental health is top-notch. The rest of the world can go suck a lemon!