17 Signs She Doesn’t Want A Relationship With You 

You want a serious relationship, but she doesn’t. This is exactly what happens in Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind. An argument about having children was the last straw that made Clementine storm away. Joel should have noticed all the clues from the get-go but he didn’t and was left devastated. That’s why you need to know all the signs she doesn’t want a relationship beforehand so you can be prepared for it. 

Loving someone who doesn’t love you back — It’s as heartbreaking as it sounds. When she is not serious about you, she won’t say it to your face. Instead, she will drop hints here and there for you to sense it.

According to research done by sociologist, Dr. Michael Rosendelf, women tend to back out of a long-term relationship for three main reasons: insensitivity from their partner, gendered stereotypes, and power imbalances in relationships. 

What Are The Signs She Doesn’t Want A Relationship With You? 

Breakups are usually initiated by both genders,, and each gender has its own set of reasons to act on it. Today we’re going to look at all the signs she doesn’t appreciate you and doesn’t want to prolong this relationship any further. Some women end it respectfully and give the closure they deserve, whereas some go on half-heartedly till it becomes toxic. 

1. Lack of communication from her side 

One of the biggest signs that she is not in love with you is when the communication deteriorates. It will go from long, heart-to-heart conversations to tedious replies like “Hmm”, “Oh, I see”, and “Right”. This doesn’t mean that you need to have interesting conversations all the time.

However, you can’t just keep things surface-level. If you feel like she’s flaking whenever you want to discuss something important, she makes excuses and runs away from having an honest conversation.

This doesn’t work in the long run. She has to go deep and open up her heart and soul to you the same way you are doing it. That’s the core of every healthy relationship. Studies show that the more you and your partner communicate frequently and without any judgment, the more you will be satisfied with the relationship. 

You May Also Like: What To Do When She Pulls Away?

2. She ditches your meetups 

It happened once? That’s fine. We are all living in a bush world. Twice? Let’s not make a big deal about it. But if it has started happening frequently, it’s one of the signs a girl doesn’t like you anymore. It’s basic human psychology.

When you are attracted to someone, you want to go on dinner dates with them. You want to explore new restaurants and new places with them.

You want to spend as much time as you can in each other’s company. However, if she is always busy with her friends rather than being with you, it’s one of the warning signs she no longer wants you.

She sees you for just a few minutes and then goes back to her friends. She doesn’t say when she wants the next date. That’s not a good thing. It’s only a matter of time before she breaks up with you. 

3. She ghosts you 

This is one of the biggest red flags in dating. You meet someone, talk to them for a few days, go on a couple of dates with them, and bam! They vanish. The phone calls and text messages stop. 

Then, out of the blue, they will hit you up a few days later as if nothing happened. If your girl is doing the same thing, then it’s one of the signs she never loved you because ghosting is extremely disrespectful. 

A Forbes research among couples found out that ghosting is a byproduct of breadcrumbing. It’s like feeding crumbs. It’s a red flag. Therefore, it is an act that can have a negative impact on people’s mental health. It may lead one of the partners to feel like they are in an inconsistent relationship, creating difficult love situations. 

4. She is hesitant to introduce you to her friends 

One of the obvious signs she has no feelings for you is when she doesn’t introduce you to her friends and family members. It’s been more than four months of dating and there are no signs of an inner circle getting involved.

Furthermore, she will ignore your pleas to meet your close friends as well. The reason why this is an important step in exclusive dating is because you need to know what your significant other is like in a group setting. 

“If you are committed to a relationship, it’s very odd to keep your social life separate from your significant other. I think this leads to trust issues and breakups no matter how you slice it. This will likely breed resentment and the eventual demise of your relationship anyway”, shares a Reddit user on why not introducing each other’s close circles is a bad idea in the long haul. 

You May Also Like: 15 Heartbreaking Signs Your Ex Never Loved You

5. She doesn’t appreciate or acknowledge you 

If she doesn’t appreciate you, it’s one of the signs she is pretending to love you. This is a big deal if you’ve been dating for at least two months. Your partner needs to appreciate and acknowledge all the things that you do for them. Here are some clear signs that reveal your girlfriend doesn’t appreciate you:

• She never says thank you after a kind act or good treatment from your side 
• She turns a blind eye to all the efforts you make in the relationship 
• She takes you for granted 
• She does not attempt to return a favor 

6. She seems disinterested in your life

All highly trained relationship coaches say that the moment your partner starts acting indifferent is the time you need to understand that they are drifting away from you intentionally or unintentionally.

Therefore, she doesn’t value you if she has stopped taking an interest in the happenings of your life. She will act like she doesn’t care what you did all day or who said what to upset you. This could also mean that perhaps your wife likes

another man.

Andrew, a 29-year-old software engineer from Massachusetts, says, “I knew things were going south when my girlfriend of two years stopped asking me about my daily life and important events alike. She wasn’t like this during the early stages of our relationship. I broke it off when I started feeling like I wasn’t seen or heard.” 

7. She compares you to others 

She’s not into you anymore when she starts comparing you to others. It doesn’t matter if it’s guys she dated in the past or her friends who are good partners. It’s wrong to compare you to anyone regardless of the status of your relationship.

This is one of the clear signs she doesn’t want a relationship with you. She’s interested in only passing her time and not taking things to a deeper level. 

“No, it’s not. It just means that you do not really like or love them. You still haven’t found what you are looking for, so do them a favor and break up. As far as I know, when you love someone, you are attracted to something unique in them and that leaves no room for comparison”, says a Quora user when asked about comparing your partner to someone else. 

8. She stopped posting your pictures on her socials 

Social media plays an important role in today’s dating scene. If you want to announce to the world that you are not single anymore, you change your Facebook status to “In a relationship” or you directly start posting pictures of you two on Instagram and Snapchat. That’s what a right person would do. 

However, if the girl you are seeing doesn’t post anything about you on her social media accounts, it’s one of the signs she doesn’t want anyone to know your presence in her life. She is either keeping you a secret or she has more than one partner. When you confront her about this, she will start making chronic excuses. 

You May Also Like: Emotional Detachment In Your Relationship- Causes, Signs, And Coping Tips

9. She is rude to you 

Being rude and being disrespectful go hand in hand. Therefore, she is no longer interested in you when she says mean, hurtful, and offensive things. Sometimes she will blurt such things under the pretense of being funny. That’s not cool. If you don’t know what rude behavior looks like, here are some signs:

• She is always late 
• She will make everything about herself. Even your birthdays have to be all about her 
• Her words won’t align with her actions 
• She doesn’t care about hurting your feelings 
• She tries to put you down in front of others 

10. She neglects your needs

She neglects all your needs including physical, emotional, and intellectual. None of your needs are being met because she’s not pursuing a relationship with you. Perhaps she just wants to casually date you and not make it exclusive. Furthermore, she is not spending time with you and doesn’t fulfill your sexual needs as well.

This is especially concerning if your sex life was good and satisfying during the early stages. You were both hot and heavy for each other when you met but now things have changed. This is one of the signs the relationship is over for her.

11. Her body language is negative 

She has stopped holding your hands. She doesn’t hug you anymore. She doesn’t kiss you on your forehead or give a small peck on your cheek. All of these things exude positive body language. On the contrary, negative body language is when she:

• Looks at you with furrowed eyebrows 
• Rolls her eyes 
• Lets out a sigh every time you say something 
• Crosses her arms 
• Avoids eye contact 
• Tries to be as physically distant from you as possible
• Smirks at you 
• Doesn’t make eye contact 

12. Her attempts to impress you have ceased 

How to know if a girl doesn’t like you anymore? She will stop trying to impress you. She used to dress up for you, put on makeup, and even cook for you when she has free time. All of these attempts to make you smile and impress have ceased to exist. This is one of the signs she’s not looking for a relationship that will last a long time. 

A girl that wants to keep things fresh and romantic will try whatever she can to put a smile on your face.

Likewise, you would do the same for her. You would bend over backward to flatter your girlfriend. If this impressing situation is only being initiated by you, then it’s not going to work out for. 

13. There are no talks about the future 

She is with you but she doesn’t talk about the future. This is one of the mixed signals that can drive you crazy. In fact, it’s a red flag if you’ve been together for more than a year. She doesn’t have to propose marriage to you or talk about having kids.

She can just reassure her love for you and say that she sees you in her future. That is all she has to do. 

Aron, a 25-year-old bartender from Los Angeles, says, “I’ve been seeing this gorgeous girl for the past month. She doesn’t want a relationship but acts like my girlfriend. I don’t know about this. I like her way more than a friend and I want to be in a serious relationship with her.” 

You May Also Like: What Does It Mean If A Girl Calls You Bro – 11 Possible Meanings And What To Do

14. She flirts with other guys 

Some women flirt with other men despite being in a committed relationship for many reasons, such as insecurity, low self-esteem, and desperate for attention. But why is she flirting with other guys when she knows you are attracted to her? It’s because:

• She doesn’t love you and can’t be serious about this relationship 
• She is a serial dater or isn’t a big fan of monogamy
• She is trying to get more attention from you by making you feel jealous 
• She is trying to gain more control and power in the relationship 

A partner who flirts with others right in front of you is someone who can never be trusted irrespective of their gender. That’s what relationship experts have been saying to save people from a potential heartbreak. So, here is tailor-made advice for you: let her go. 

15. She makes you feel lonely 

If she makes you feel lonely despite being in a relationship, it’s one of the signs she doesn’t like you more than a friend. What do friends do? They hang out for a while, hear your woes, tell you it’s going to get better, and go home. However, a person who loves you will try whatever they can in their capacity to make things better for you.

The right person will validate your feelings. She will give you their two cents on what you need to do if you are stuck in a difficult situation. She will try to make sure you don’t beat yourself up over a work problem.

All of these things come into play when you are determining whether or not she wants to be in a relationship with you. 

16. She has stopped saying “I love you” 

I love you — these three magical words hold a lot of power. You long to hear these words from the love of your life. If she has said it to you at least once in a romantic way, then why has she stopped saying it? It’s definitely not because she is feeling uncomfortable to share her feelings.

Plus, she has also stopped doing sweet things for you. It’s because she doesn’t love you anymore and you are the only one saying and doing all romantic things. This could be a sign of emotional detachment. 

Zack, a 35-year-old entrepreneur from New York, says, “This girl I met on Tinder confessed her love from me within two months of casual dating. It was purely physical in the beginning but later we both fell head over heels in love. Now she is acting aloof and distant. She is saying she doesn’t want a relationship but wants to keep seeing me. I don’t understand such situationships.” 

17. She talks about being single  

This is one of the evident signs she doesn’t want a relationship with you. She talks fondly about being single. She says she misses the bachelor life and would rather go back to it. People in relationship do miss the partner-less days where they could enjoy everything without any restrictions and limitations.

However, it’s not nice of your girl to keep repeating it all the time. It may start making you feel like you don’t deserve her. This may turn into resentment soon. She needs to sort her priorities if she doesn’t want to lose out on a guy like you. 

These are some of the genuinely helpful signs she no longer wants to see you. If you are clueless and don’t know what to do when she is losing interest, read along and find out.

You May Also Like: How To Stop Thinking About Your Ex — 13 Practical Tips

5 Things To Do If She Is Not Interested In You 

What to do when she is no longer interested in you? If you’ve spotted all the signs that you both aren’t on the same page, here are some effective things you can do about it:

1. Respect her feelings 

Accept that not everyone will share the same romantic feelings. Respect her decision and don’t pressure her. Don’t coerce her into loving you back or staying in the relationship. Love doesn’t work that way. It has to come from within.

So, when you spot these signs, it’s best to respect her feelings and give her the space she needs. Both physical and emotional space. Pushing and trying too hard will only lead to discomfort and you will look desperate at the end of the day. 

2. Focus on self-care 

This is the time to focus on personal growth and explore the activities that bring you joy. Strengthen your own well-being by doing things like:

• Journaling your feelings 
• Replacing negative thoughts with positive ones 
• Exercise regularly 
• Expand your social circle and meet new people 
• Set goals and priorities 
• Practice gratitude 
• Don’t jump into a new relationship 

3. Communicate openly 

If she is no longer interested in you, then have an open and honest conversation about your current relationship and feelings. That’s one of the most effective methods of communication. Try to seek clarity by being a strong, supportive man and don’t play the blame game or accuse her of playing with your feelings. Be kind to her and listen to what she has to say. Don’t jump to conclusions and avoid making assumptions.

Also, keep your voice down and make sure you don’t use “you” statements. Instead, let your feelings be known by using “I” statements. For example, “I feel like I am not being heard in the relationship” or “I don’t feel loved. I could be wrong but that’s how I am feeling at the moment.” 

4. Maintain friendship 

If she is comfortable, ask her if she would like to maintain a friendly connection without expectations of romance. Spend time together as friends as genuine friendships can be valuable. You won’t lose out on an amazing person either. If she doesn’t value you even after this, it’s time to part ways.

5. Learn and grow from this experience 

Reflect on the situation to gain insights about yourself and your relationships. Use this as a learning experience for future interactions. Don’t harbor resentment against her and start badmouthing her to your friends and family members. That’s never a good thing. 

Love sometimes can become complicated. She was madly in love with you but now she is giving you the cold shoulder. Ultimately, prioritizing self-respect comes first. Don’t let her bring your self-esteem down. Therefore, focus on personal growth and don’t let her rejection affect you in any negative way. 

FAQs