It is natural for men to vie for the attention of a woman, but if a married man continuously makes efforts to get your attention, it can be confusing. Perhaps you have already tried to brush him off, but he is persistent, making you wonder if he is genuinely in love with you. And so you are here, with a perplexed mix of emotions, looking for the signs a married man is in love with you
Perhaps your heart too races when he talks to you, offers you help with work, or makes you feel special. You feel like he gets you like no one else, but yes, he is married. You two share an intense chemistry, he cares for you and is super nice to you, but, is he serious about you?
What is the reality of dating a married man? Let’s find an answer to all this and more as we tell you how to pick up signs that a married man is in love with you.
When a married man falls for you, it makes sense to be sure about his real intentions to save yourself from pain, heartbreak and the tag of being the other woman.
When a married man says ‘I love you’ to another woman, you may feel special but also wonder if he is considering taking it further.
It might be just his way of having a good time with an extramarital affair, or he could be genuinely interested in you and true to his romantic feelings for you. Who knows?! So let’s delve deeper into this maze of emotions and understand the signs that a married man loves you.
What Are The Signs A Married Man Is In Love With You?
Most men find it difficult to express their new love and feelings because of their marital status. When a married man says he misses you, it means that you are his true love interest, but he has not yet reached the point where he can honestly own up to his emotions.
A married man falling in love with another woman is indeed a tricky situation, leaving you in a dilemma: This man feels for me and stares at me all the time, but does he love me in the first place? He says he thinks about me all the time, but will he leave his wife for me?” Fret not! Keep an eye out for these tell-tale signs to find out if this man is in love with you.
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1. His approach to his married life
A married man in love with someone else will either discuss his married life threadbare or completely refrain from even mentioning the same. You could be facing either of the two situations: this married man never mentions his wife, or he flirts but mentions his wife.
By being too vocal about his marriage, he might try to give the impression that it is a failed marriage. Since he is not happy with his love life, he is showing interest in other women.
His honest communication about his marital status also suggests the transparency he wants in his relationship with you.
If he hardly ever talks about his wife or never gets her to office parties, then it could be his guilt at play. He is overwhelmed with his guilt, which bogs him down and keeps him from talking about his wife and family members. Read between the lines to decode his motives accurately.
2. He acts as your superhero
Most married men have this hero instinct in them. You have a tiff with a co-worker, he takes your side. Your car breaks down, he helps you fix it or drops you home.
You are stuck on a project, he works overtime to help you get through. He is your hero, flying down to get you out of a rut every time you are in trouble.
He is always by your side because, even though he is married, he still cares for you. And he cares for you more than he ideally should. You can trust him to resolve issues for you, as he smoothly steers his way through the little things that matter.
You will know if your married colleague is in love with you when he goes out of his way to lend you a helping hand.
3. He tries to find common interests
You know someone likes you when they hint at the similarities or the shared interests.
- He will constantly remind you of the common ground between you two
- He will tell you that you are the type of girl he always wanted
- He tries to develop the same interests as yours
- He wants to know your areas of interest and hobbies
- He always wants to show how similar you both are and manages to draw some analogy or the other
If you find him imitating your actions, mannerisms, or language, then it is certainly one of the signs a married man is in love with you. He is not only making an effort to get to know you better but is also attempting to forge a close connection with you.
Shared interests and passions give you common ground to talk about, bringing you closer to each other. By doing so, he is trying to woo you and also get closer to you.
4. His body language screams out his love for you
One of the most obvious signs of a married man flirting with you is his body language. The alpha male hidden deep inside him comes to the fore. While he might still be toying with the idea of confessing his love, his body language will spill the tea.
His making eye contact with you, looking at you when laughing, leaning in to talk to you, and getting nervous around you are some of the good signs. He would even try to steal an opportunity to make physical contact with you, albeit in a friendly way, while handing you things on the pretext of shaking hands, giving out high-fives, etc.
The way he uses space around him, the way he presents himself before you—all these subtle things will help you understand his intentions better. If he loves you but is scared for obvious reasons, and he is fighting his feelings for you, you’d know that by reading his body language better.
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5. He showers you with compliments
‘I don’t like being complimented’—said’no woman ever! And men know this very well. So, you will see this married guy complimenting you every now and then for your beauty, intelligence, professional skills, style and fashion sense, common sense, et al.
Now, of course, there are guys who compliment women just for the sake of it. But this one will be careful enough to notice little nuances about you before complimenting you. They will compliment you in the least expected way to let you know their interest in you. And for the things that will steal your heart anyway.
It is a huge sign from their end that they are noticing you. It means they are paying attention to every little detail. And it is not for nothing that they are showering you with all the care, attention, and… compliments!
6. He makes you his priority
One of the most clear signs a married man loves you is that he makes time for you. Every time, without fail. We all know time is a luxury, and if someone chooses to spend it over you, it can’t be for superficial reasons, right?
- You want him to help you run errands? He is there for you
- You are feeling down and dejected. He will lift your spirits
- You need to tend to your nursery. He will get his gardening toolkit
He chooses you over his own family and spouse because he loves spending time with you. His free time during the weekends should ideally be for his own family. Yet he chooses to prioritize you above everything else. He loves talking to you and making time for you, and he will go to great lengths to make you happy.
7. He is curious about your love life
So he likes you. But before he tells you about his feelings, he needs to know about your relationship status. He shows a deep interest in your love life and is always asking you about who you are dating etc.
He just wants to be sure that he is the only man in your life. Knowing your availability for a relationship is of utmost importance to him, and so he keeps a tab on your dating and relationship life.
Additionally, a married man who has strong feelings for you will easily get jealous if he feels you arre getting interested in someone else.
A man is interested in a woman’s love life only when he is attracted to her. If your dating status is a recurrent feature in your conversations, then understand that he wants to express his feelings for you.
He is just gaining a clearing ground before doing so. His curiosity about your love life is one of the most clear signs a married man likes you but is hiding it.
8. He shows his vulnerable side to you
Picture this: You both are casually hanging out when suddenly he opens up about his fears and insecurities. He lets you into his inner world and shares his thoughts and feelings with you.
The seemingly hard exterior that he has been putting up for so long, crumbles up before you as he bursts out in tears, expressing his worries and anxieties.
He trusts you with his deepest and darkest emotions. He sees a safe haven in you and isn’t afraid of being emotionally vulnerable with you. This emotional vulnerability underscores his deep love for you.
Men usually have a hard time opening up to people. So if you make him feel safe enough to do so, then it is one of the clear signs a committed man has fallen for you.
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9. He is a different person when you are around
He likes you more than a friend. So it is natural for him to act and behave differently. When he is with others, he is his natural self—faulty and imperfect. But when he is with you, he puts his best foot forward because he has feelings for you and wants to impress you.
This ‘difference’ in his behavior could actually stem from his nervousness or anxiety, his need to leave a lasting impression on you. He fears screwing things up and hence treads cautiously or ‘differently’.
He wants to come across as someone who has got it all–looks, intelligence, humor, fashion sense, confidence, success, and everything else.
But, why is he making so much effort to be the ‘best’? Just to impress you! Clearly, this is one of the sure-shot signs a married man is attracted to you!
10. He appears more groomed than ever
As a tactic in continuation to the one above, his efforts to groom himself better
- Running his hands through his hair while talking to you
- Asking you if you noticed his new hairstyle
- Dressing impeccably everyday
- Making sure to hit the gym or atleast mention it to you casually
- Tidying himself up or adjusting his clothes on seeing you
- Making sure he is always smelling great
These are just some of the indicators that he wants to be physically attractive just to get your attention. Your opinion on him matters to him and he wants to ensure that it is a good one.
A word of caution here: make sure that all his efforts are directed toward you and not anyone else.
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11. He discusses his future plans with you
When a married man loves you, he takes you along on a ride to peep into his future. He might discuss what plans he has for his future, and how and where he envisions himself in a couple of months or years.
You might even get to hear of him planning to leave his wife to put an end to his marriage. Considering the gravity of the matter, he would not fool around and talk about it in jest.
If you notice this final nail in the coffin, know that he is seriously considering being with the one person he loves the most: you. He has already figured out how to stay committed to you and hence wants to leave his current wife to pursue you.
If cannot get clearer than this – if a man has been planning his future with you featuring in it, it is wise to take a pause and think about what you want to do. Put an end to this if dating a married man is not on the cards, or go with the flow if you feel the same for him.
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12. He is jealous of other guys you talk to
Some signs a married man is jealous if someone approaches you or you mention someone specific would include him getting upset, putting down the other man and distancing himself Jealousy has always been an indicator of love, hasn’t it?
- You tell him how cute and helpful your new neighbor is, and he cautions you against strangers
- You eye a mutual co-worker and comment on his smart dressing sense, and he brings to your notice how the co-worker messed up a project
- There is a guy who has been eyeing you for some days, and he goes upto him and tells him to back-off
- You mention about an old crush, and he feels uneasy and uncomfortable.
The one thing common to all these scenarios is his streak of jealousy. He gets irked by your very mention of any other man in your life and exhibits signs of possessiveness. His first reaction to any other guy is negative because he envies that guy.
This one is a crystal clear sign of his romantic feelings for you, which makes him go green with envy. Tread carefully if you want to take things further with this married man, since his excessive possessiveness can also be a huge red flag.
13. He tries to develop an emotional connection
A married man cares in a way that no other single man can. This is because he has already been in a marital relationship and can understand the value of emotional bonds. He will go beyond the physical and invest in the emotional.
Physical lust or attraction holds less significance than deep emotional connections for women, and married men are well aware of this.
Stop googling ‘my boss likes me signs’ to be certain of his feelings for you. You know he has fallen for you if he indulges in deep and meaningful conversations with you.
Instead of going clubbing with you, he would rather steal moments of quietude that can foster a strong emotional bond and bring you two closer to each other.
14. He pampers you
He will always do all the sweet little things in the world that couples do for each other. One of the signs a married man is in love with you is his tendency to pamper you with gifts and affection.
He speaks the love language of gifts wherein he expresses his feelings for you by getting you flowers and chocolates, celebrating your special days, and making a big thing out of your little achievements and milestones.
Sarah, a 32-year-old marketeer, confided to her BFF Jane, ‘I think a married man is obsessed with me. There is always a bunch of fresh flowers on my work desk. The other day, someone delivered a cake to my home to celebrate my kitten Jo’s birthday!’ Soon, she found out it was her boss behind all these sweet gestures.
15. He invites you into his inner circle
You can easily rattle off the names of his close friends and can actually identify them based on the stories of their antics you’ve heard. Married men can go a step further and introduce you to them if they are serious about you.
They will have you come over on their friends’ nights out and let you in their circle of close buddies. He knows he is married, but his love for you will make him introduce you to some of his closest friends and is indicative of his strong feelings for you.
Getting to know his colleagues or friends might seem like a trivial thing on the surface. But, it really suggests that he is ready for the big commitment by making you a part of his social circle. He might not have mustered the courage to confess his love to you, but he can surely introduce his SO to his friends. And this indicates he is not using you.
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16. He is concerned for you
His concern for your well-being is one of the huge signs a married man is in love with you. He not only cares for you but is willing to go the extra mile to make sure that you are happy and safe. His genuine concern for your happiness, safety, and well-being shines through his words and gestures.
You are down with viral, and they have you delivered a steaming bowl of chicken soup to get you back on your feet. They frequently check on you to see how you are doing. You are going through a tough time, and they lend you a listening ear and a shoulder to cry on. When things get really murky, they see through the signs and take you to a therapist. This married man loves you truly and cares for you.
17. He supports your goals
If a married man likes you, he will do everything in his power to support your goals. He will encourage you to follow your dreams and passions while he steadfastly cheers you on. He provides you with all the physical and mental support to help you realize your ambitions.
He not only knows what your goals in life are but actively stands by your side in your efforts to achieve them. You will see through his help and encouragement as his profound love will gleam through it.
What To Do When A Married Man Says “I Love You”
Jess had a co-worker who confessed his love for her after an office party, even though he had been married for 10 years. Needless to say, Jess was taken aback by the confession. She spent the whole night analyzing the situation: “So there’s this married man pursuing me, and he wants to leave his wife for me. He has a wife, but says he loves me? How do I be sure about his falling in love?”
Hear it from our love gurus on the crucial matter of what to do when a married man says he misses you and utters those three little words.
- Be mindful of everyone’s feelings. Remember that he has an already existing relationship and commitment
- Have an honest and open conversation with him. Discuss the scenario with him to learn more about his relationship status, his married life, and his personal life. He might want to reflect on his commitments and their consequences on the other woman and his current marriage
- Know the consequences. Whether it feels guilty to have an affair or your reputation feels threatened in the face of severe criticism or judgment, the emotional baggage can take a toll on you. Be prepared to face it with all your might
- Stay true to your feelings. Do what your heart says will make you happy. In the end, your mental and emotional well-being should come above all
- Make the right choice, judiciously. Pay close attention to your priorities. Would you rather be single and happy or allow yourself to fall in love despite his wedding ring? The choice is yours
Loving a married man can be tricky and complicated, to say the least. These signs, though genuine, come with a significant moral and ethical weight. It’s essential to approach such situations with care, respecting all parties involved and prioritizing your own emotional well-being. Love is a powerful force, and navigating it in these circumstances can be challenging.
Infographic: Signs A Married Man Really Loves You
FAQs
A person can develop strong feelings for someone outside their marriage, but the depth of love may vary. Ultimately, love within or outside a marriage is complex, and each situation is unique.
Yes, a married man can experience genuine feelings of love for someone other than his spouse. Love is a complex emotion that can develop in various circumstances, but it often comes with moral and ethical considerations.