A supportive man sounds like a myth in these times, doesn’t it? You will be surprised to know that there are still young men out there who want their women to be the best version of themselves. They know how to be a man in a relationship. They have kept themselves away from toxic masculinity. They can understand their partner’s mind without judging them. And most importantly, they know how to treat their significant other with respect, admiration, affection, and honesty. 

Women are attracted toward a supportive man who will enhance the quality of her love life and someone who will help her conquer the world. is crucial because it promotes emotional well-being.

Research has found that emotional support from a partner can buffer against stress, anxiety, and depression, promoting better mental health. So, this is the right time to man up in the relationship and learn some tricks up your sleeve to make your girl fall head over heels in love with you. 

What Does It Mean To Be A Man In A Relationship 

It is essential to recognize that there is no fixed definition of what it means to be a man in a relationship. These expectations can differ from one relationship to another. However, one thing is constant in all couple dynamics — Being a man in a relationship doesn’t mean you have to conform to gender stereotypes. It takes courage to let go of the traditional gender roles and embrace equality. That right there will contribute the most in building happy relationships.

In a broader sense, when you take charge in a relationship as a man, it involves being a caring and respectful partner, nurturing emotional intimacy, and actively working toward a healthy and fulfilling partnership. You won’t care about what others have to say about your bond. You know your priorities and you know how to make your partner feel loved, valued, and treasured. 

Oprah Winfrey once quoted, “You cannot change a man’s behavior. Change comes from within”. So, as long as you aren’t ready to change your habits, you won’t ever become a better man in your relationships. If you are ready to make that change, read along and find out how you can tailor your being to become a real man. 

What Is The Role Of A Man In A Relationship? 

Men and women have certain roles to play in life. No. We aren’t talking about the age-old customs and conventions where women cooked and cleaned and men went out to hunt and earn. Times have changed. Roles have changed. Women aren’t as dependent and reliant on men as they used to be. Having said that, it doesn’t mean men don’t have any responsibilities or any parts to play in a woman’s life. It’s all about working together as a team to experience the nuances of a happy relationship. 

There are many roles a strong man in a relationship has to play. But most importantly, a man who is truly interested in a woman will never leave her guessing her role, her importance, and her worth in his life. He will ensure she knows where she stands. He will make sure she feels safe around him. Also, a real man will pursue the woman he wants with honest communication, genuine intentions, and consistent effort. 

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How To Be A Man In A Relationship — 12 Ways 

A man decides and concludes that a woman wants money, cars, and expensive gifts. You couldn’t be more wrong. She just wants an authentic, respectful, and an understanding person who will actively work to create a loving and supportive bond. Yes, that’s how easy and uncomplicated it is. Here are some more tips you can learn on how to step up as a man in a relationship. 

1. A real man will provide security and protection 

By security and protection, we don’t mean to say that women like extra macho guys who would beat up other men if they tease or harass them. Nope. Women like guys who can create a sense of security and protection in their relationship. A real man is someone who won’t threaten her insecurities by comparing her to other women or by making her feel jealous. 

A good partner is someone whose presence will make your girlfriend feel calm and secure. She will feel at ease when you are with her, and he will help alleviate her anxieties, concerns, and worries. A real man protects, heals, and helps her see the good in herself. Here are some more ways to protect her and make her feel safe:

  • Don’t threaten to leave her and instill fear inside her when the two of you are in a fight
  • You need to handle conflicts carefully. No shouting, yelling, or throwing things around to scare her and make yourself appear stronger and superior  
  • You won’t touch her inappropriately and make her feel uncomfortable 
  • You won’t put your partner down in front of other people and make her feel like she is alone
  • A real man will protect her emotional well-being as much as her physical self 

2. He won’t be afraid of commitment 

What’s the one big difference between serial daters and a real man? The latter will never be afraid of committing to the woman he loves. He won’t give excuses like:

  • He is afraid of commitment 
  • He won’t lead a woman on 
  • He won’t give lame excuses like currently he is focusing on his career or that his parents won’t agree
  • He won’t blame it on time and say that the timing is off 

Most women run away from men who use the above sentences as excuses to not commit but still avail all the benefits of being in a relationship. Such men are cowards who hide their character flaws like low self-esteem and self-worth by hiding behind commitment issues. 

3. Practice empathy, kindness, and chivalry  

When you practice empathy, kindness, and chivalry, you step up as a man in a relationship. By tapping into those three attributes, you will consciously contribute to healthy and respectful relationships. A real man will stand i his girlfriend’s shoes and see her perspective. He will show kindness by being compassionate, considerate, and gentle in his actions and words. He will also:

  • Make an effort to treat his significant other with respect and care
  • Indulge in acts of kindness, both big and small to create a loving and nurturing environment
  • He will be chivalrous. For example, he will offer his assistance when a woman is carrying heavy items
  • He will understand the importance of equality and will utilize them in his relationship

These three things should be a two-way street. It should be mutual. If you do these things for her, she should also return your kindness and empathy. Otherwise, it will become a one-sided relationship

how to be a man in a relationship

4. Accept her good and bad sides

This is one of the most important qualities of a good man in a relationship. He will accept his partner’s strengths and weaknesses. Some men run away when they see their partner at their lowest or when they find out about their partner’s character flaw. However, real men stand by their BAE’s side instead of pouring cold water and will accept her for who she is. 

Listed below are some key points on how accepting your partner will nourish your relationship:

  • It will make her happy and she will realize how big of a catch you are
  • This acceptance will let her know what unconditional love means 
  • She will be grateful to you for not trying to change her or fix her 
  • You need to appreciate her unique views on life, love, and relationships 
  • In return, she will also show acceptance and appreciation for your love, affection, trust, and kindness

5. Maintain mutual respect 

A good relationship thrives on mutual respect. If you love her, you will automatically respect her. Moreover, research consistently shows that respect is strongly associated with higher levels of relationship satisfaction. Feeling respected by one’s partner fosters a positive emotional climate and a sense of security in the relationship. 

Here are some ways you can maintain respect and become a better partner:

  • You will appreciate her efforts regardless of how trivial or huge they are
  • You need to respect her emotional boundaries. You also need consent before touching your partner physically. Not all women like to be touched even if they are in love with a person. So, always ask for consent before jumping the gun
  • You will address tough situations with constructive criticisms and without trying to shift blame
  • You should use “I” statements when discussing sensitive conversations 
  • You will respect even those who are total strangers like waiters, drivers, and other people who belong to the lower social status than you 

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6. Be emotionally available and vulnerable  

Women love when a guy sheds his masculinity and chauvinism. It’s never about your six pack abs, your muscles, and how many good punches you can give, or how much wealth you have. It’s always what’s on the inside that matters, else even with those abs and muscles you are still weak on the inside.

The moment you drop your “I am a man so I will never cry” act, she will be ready to give you full time commitment. Your first initiative now should be all about letting go of old-fashioned thinking that men have to be strong.

Some other things you can do to be more emotionally available and vulnerable include: 

  • Encourage meaningful discussions and honest communication in your relationship
  • Create an environment where both you and your partner feel comfortable sharing your thoughts and feelings without judgment
  • Be vulnerable. Share your deepest insecurities, traumas, and fears
  • Tell her about your own dreams, life goals, and ambitions 
  • Crack jokes to lighten up serious situations 

7. A real man won’t be selfish in bed 

Listen up, gentlemen! Women love sex as much as men do. In fact, a new survey conducted in 114 countries (it’s the largest research on sex) has found that women think about sex more than men. In addition to that, when you have a satisfying sexual relationship, you also end up having a peaceful romantic relationship.

Ergo, if you are selfish in bed, you need to prioritize your partner’s pleasures as women seriously dislike those who only care about their gratification and turn a blind eye to others’ needs, desires, and fantasies. 

Here are some ways you can avoid being selfish in bed:

  • Firstly, talk and try to understand your partner mentally. Guys assuming what their girlfriends want is the worst thing ever. Talk to them about consent, boundaries, and their turn offs
  • Spend ample time on foreplay 
  • Explore each other’s fantasies
  • Try to experiment with new positions, techniques, and gadgets
  • Avoid rushing to reach climax. Take your time. Enjoy the moment
  • Lastly, practice aftercare. Get her tissues, cuddle with each other, and cook her favorite meal

8. Show her off to the world

You know what man keeps his girl a secret? The one who likes to date multiple women. That’s the kind of man women hate the most. If you don’t have the courage to be honest with her about your serial dating phenomenon and womanizer shenanigans, it’s best to not approach her and lead her on.

Furthermore, women dislike indecisive guys. You are either into her or you are not. You either tell her you don’t want anything serious or don’t give her hopes as if you have a future together. If you don’t know how to not keep her hidden from the world, here are some ways you can ensure your girlfriend that you are serious about her:

  • Post your pictures with her on social media. Let the other women know that you are off the market 
  • Spend quality time with her in public places like cafés and bars. It’s high time you stop meeting her in secret 
  • Introduce her to your friends and family members 
  • You can also change your relationship status on your social media accounts
Don't keep your relationship a secret
Image by lookstudio on Freepik

9. Take accountability for your actions

A real man knows when he is wrong. He knows when he has crossed the line and hurt his partner. He is well aware of his shortcomings. He won’t blameshift. He won’t use physical aggressors to keep his point on the table. He won’t run away from taking responsibility for his actions. He’d work hard to apologize and his sincerity will reflect in his actions.

Robust studies have found that taking accountability for one’s actions leads to personal growth and learning. Acknowledging mistakes and understanding their impact allows individuals to learn from their experiences and make better choices in the future. Also, they have the potential to heal relationships and soothe hurt feelings. 

Most men think that apologizing is a sign of weakness. But only mature men know that it’s a sign of bravery and strength. Here are some ways you can ace accountability:

  • Acknowledge your mistake
  • Avoid getting defensive 
  • Offer a sincere heartfelt apology 
  • Make amends by offering support and providing restitution 
  • Accept the consequences 
  • Change your behavior for the better 

10. Take charge of the relationship when needed

Two people can’t drive one car at the same time. One has to drive and the other has to ride shotgun and offer support. Relationships are the same. One person can’t always be the driving force. It has to keep switching from one partner to the other. When your girlfriend is battling with work problems, then you take the lead and arrange a dinner date. You can take the initiative and plan the trip. 

Keep in mind that this doesn’t mean you can misuse this power imbalance and start controlling her. That’s emotional abuse. If you don’t want to look like a control freak, here are some things you can do:

  • When it’s needed, be the leader. Not a controller
  • Create a balanced situation where you and your partner feel heard and validated 
  • Build trust with your partner by being transparent 
  • No mind games, manipulation, and gaslighting whatsoever 
  • Don’t jump to your own conclusions and leave room for suspicion and mistrust. This can destroy your relationship 
  • Have the expectations talk

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11. He will crush stereotypes and gender roles 

A man who respects you will not give in to traditional gender roles. He won’t expect you to become his mother. He will look after himself and he will look after you as well. Furthermore; a mature man wants a relationship to be 50/50:

  • You will do the dishes if your partner is cooking
  • You will get the groceries if she is doing the laundry
  • You will pick up the kids from school if your partner dropped them 
  • You will pay for the meal this time if she swiped her card on the previous date

It’s all about creating a balanced environment where both the parties feel comfortable, equal, and balanced. 

12. Always have your partner’s back 

A real man will always have his partner’s back by being supportive, loyal, and empathetic. This act of love will foster a deep emotional connection, trust, and a positive environment for personal growth and shared experiences in the relationship. This partnership built on mutual support and care will thrive and withstand the challenges that life brings. Man up in the relationship by having your partner’s back in the following ways:

  • Stay loyal. No micro-cheating, financial infidelity, or one-night-stands
  • A healthy relationship means celebrating your woman. Her flaws, strong points, successes, and her failures 
  • Encourage her to pursue her dreams even if they seem far-fetched 
  • Work together as a team when met with conflicts and disagreements 
  • Prioritize her emotional and physical well-being
  • Practice forgiveness. Let go of grudges and unmet expectations 

Key Takeaways 

  • Being a man in a relationship doesn’t mean you have to don the role of a superhero. You just have to be emotionally available and make her feel secure in your presence 
  • Spend quality time with her and let her know that there is no one else in your life. A real man protects his girl’s secrets 
  • You can also step up as a man by committing to her and not disrespecting her 

Being a man in a relationship involves embodying positive qualities and behaviors. It’s about promoting equality, sharing responsibilities, and involving her in decision-making. Contributing to financial stability and being responsible with money matters. These are life lessons that will always help you in creating peaceful and harmonious relationships.