A real man knows when he has made a mistake and admits to being wrong. In fact, he learns from it and ensures he doesn’t make the same mistake again down the lane. However, there are some guys who feel bad for hurting you. Today, that’s what we will look at. All the clear signs a guy knows he messed up and no matter how subtle they are. We will talk about his regrets, remorse, and ruefulness. 

Some men ignore all their wrongdoings and go about their lives as if they are perfect. He won’t even bother giving you a sincere apology regarding his past mistakes. On the other hand, this guy whom you just broke up with seems to be in mourning. He seems to be truly sorry for what has happened between the two of you. But how do guys act when they know they messed up? Let’s find out.

19 Clear Signs A Guy Knows He Messed Up

Perhaps he cheated while in a serious relationship with you or disrespected you in front of your friends and family members. Or maybe he just didn’t give you enough time and attention to make you feel special. Whatever the reason behind this messy situation is, he will be genuinely remorseful. Below are clear instances and signs a guy knows he messed up: 

When He Can’t Apologize Enough

It takes a strong man to own up to his mistakes. So, when he is sorry for what he did, he will acknowledge his mistakes by doing the following things:

1. He will sincerely apologize

When a man realizes he lost a good woman because of his own silly actions, he will make it a point to reflect on his behavior and apologize. He won’t stop saying sorry. He will demonstrate that his actions and words have indeed caused harm and hurt. By doing this, he is validating your feelings, thoughts, and experiences. That’s how a healthy relationship works. 

It is an honest way of taking responsibility for his behavior. And since apologies can mend and strengthen relationships, even he might think that it would lead to forgiveness and a sense of closure, allowing both to either reconcile or move on from one another. 

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2. He will mean everything he says 

If the two of you were in a serious relationship and his wrongdoings are haunting him, he won’t say sorry just for the heck of it. He will mean every word that comes out of his mouth. This is one of the obvious signs he knows he hurt you. But how will you know if he means what he says? Here are some clear signs he isn’t saying sorry to just make you feel better:

  • It’s not just words but his actions will also show how sorry he is. For example, if he promised to never say hurtful things again, then he will stick to his words 
  • His tone of voice will be sincere 
  • Honest individuals tend to provide clear and detailed information when they speak. So, he won’t avoid questions or provide vague answers

3. He will apologize to your loved ones

If you want to know how sorry he is, wait for him to take as big a step as this one. Even though he has apologized to you like a million times, he will also apologize to your friends and family for hurting you. Most men don’t do this unless they are genuinely sorry about their past mistakes. Hence, when a guy admits he messed up, he will also admit the same with your loved ones. 

4. He asks your friends to apologize on your behalf 

Following on from the previous point, he will make sure he asks mutual friends about your well-being. He will tell them or your best friend to send his message across. He will request them to apologize to you on his behalf, especially if you have blocked him from everywhere. This is one of the clear signs a guy knows he messed up. 

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5. He begs you to communicate with him

One of the biggest signs he wants to fix the relationship is when he initiates an open, honest, and judgment-free conversation. He won’t post pictures of sad quotes on social media and try to gain sympathy from you. He will hit you up directly and will want to sit down and have an honest conversation regarding what went down and how badly he wants to reconcile. 

When a guy hurts you and wants to reconcile
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When He Thinks You Deserve Better 

When a guy hurts you and holds himself accountable for the break up, he will apologize and quietly walk away from the relationship. He knows the foreseeable future is dark without you and he has to live with it. Therefore, he will do the following things when he knows he can’t stop making mistakes: 

6. He will ask you to move on 

A man who sincerely loves you but knows you will never get back together with him will encourage you to move on and find someone better. Someone who won’t lie to you, cheat on you, disrespect you, or deceive you.

He will ask you to find a new partner who is honest, hardworking, and someone who will support you and help you achieve all your dreams and ambitions. This is one of the signs he wants to get your forgiveness by helping you move on in life. 

7. He is ashamed of himself 

If you were in a long-term relationship with him, then your ex-boyfriend will definitely be feeling guilty for putting you through so much pain again. He will be ashamed of himself for hurting you. He is not trying to get back together by doing all this. He is just truly sorry and he will try whatever he can to become a supportive man in the relationship.

The fact that you gave your all to this relationship and he threw it without thinking twice is just one of the little things that will make him regret losing you. He will become more sensitive toward your true feelings and will take extra care not to hurt you further. 

8. He stops contacting you 

One of the signs a guy knows he messed up is when he stops contacting you because the more he keeps texting and calling you, the more difficult it is for you and him to move on. He knows this and that’s why he will completely cut ties with you. He will establish a no-contact rule to help you move on and not dwell on an ex-partner who couldn’t keep her trust intact.

He will stop following you on all social media profiles and he doesn’t want you to give him a second chance. He knows he won’t live up to your expectations. So, the best thing he can do right now is walk out of your life. 

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9. He won’t trash talk about you

Most guys start badmouthing their ex as soon as they break up. However, a man who truly feels sorry for hurting you will never talk bad about you with anyone. That’s the right thing to do. He will keep things private and won’t discuss anything with anyone. That’s his hero instinct. He will protect you from a harsh post-breakup experience that most people go through. 

10. He will hold you in high regards 

Even if you and your ex-boyfriend have moved on, he will always remember you with fondness. He won’t recall the bad memories but only the good times that he spent with you. You have moved on with a new guy and so did he. Your ex moved on and is in a rebound relationship with a new girlfriend but you still hear from mutual friends that he talks about you as if you are the best thing that ever happened to him. 

when he isn’t ready to move on he knows he messed up
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When He Isn’t Able To Move On 

Looking for some signs a guy knows he messed up badly? It’s when he isn’t ready to move on. He is drowning in sorrow and isn’t able to handle all the negative emotions he is going through. He feels guilty. He feels ashamed. He doesn’t know how to get over it. Scroll down and find out more about such situations where a guy regrets hurting you and isn’t able to forget about it: 

11. He blames himself for the breakup 

He will blame himself and express self-criticism for what he did, indicating that he recognizes his wrongdoing. He will even admit to his friends that it was all his mistake and that you don’t deserve what you are going through. He is the reason why you are in a bad place in life. He is aware of this and he blames himself. This is one of the signs he feels bad about the breakup. 

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12. He has a hard time forgiving himself 

He struggles with forgiving himself for the pain he caused you, which can affect his own emotional well-being. Some of the signs he is having a hard time forgiving himself include: 

  • He will withdraw from major life events, social interactions, and isolate himself from friends and loved ones
  • He will engage in negative self-talk, berating himself for what he did
  • He will struggle to focus on tasks or make decisions because their thoughts are consumed by self-blame 
  • He will have a diminished sense of self-worth and believe that he doesn’t deserve happiness or forgiveness

13. He is still single  

One of the obvious signs a guy knows he messed up is when he remains single for a very long time after going separate ways. One thing’s for sure here. He loves only you. He doesn’t want a new relationship because he knows he won’t find anyone better than you. He is heartbroken over you and will take his time to heal from this heartbreak before he moves on and starts a new romantic relationship. 

14. He takes therapy 

When a guy messes up really badly and isn’t able to focus on anything else besides his faults, he will have a hard time managing his day-to-day activities. Professional help during these times can help him clear his head and gain some perspective. Reaching out for help will be the first step for him in acknowledging the loss and moving past it. He will take therapy and reach out to relationship experts to get better. 

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15. His life has become chaotic 

A guy messed up and regrets putting you through so much pain. He will be miserable and both his professional and personal life will become chaotic.  Henwill engage in self-destructive behaviors, like excessive drinking or risky actions, as a form of self-punishment. Furthermore, feelings of guilt and self-blame can lead to symptoms of depression and anxiety.

When he wants you back in his life
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When He Wants To Reconcile 

A guy who wants to come back into your life knows that he won’t find anyone else like you. So, he will make amends and he will make things right by you. He will move heaven and earth to get you back in his life by doing the following things: 

16. He will show self-improvement 

How long does it take to correct someone’s flaws? It can’t happen immediately but your ex-partner will improve himself by taking responsibility for everything that went wrong. He knows he messed up big time.

He won’t repeat his mistakes and won’t give you anything to complain about either. He will be consistent in his actions. His hero instincts will make him a better partner. He will do all this just to prove that he has changed and won’t hurt you again. 

17. He will try to be in your good books

He won’t just be feeling guilty and crying in his after putting you through hell. A guy who wants to reconcile will try to be in your good books by changing himself. For example, if you hated a particular habit of his like smoking or spending excessive time playing video games, then he will change his habits.

He will chuck them out of his life to win you over. He won’t talk to other girls you don’t like. So if you are wondering if he will come back, notice the things he does to woo you back.

18. He buys you gifts

One of the good signs a guy knows he messed up is when he starts buying you both small and grand gifts. He will indulge in grand gestures as well. That’s one way to get your approval. He will make sure he taps into all your love languages to make you fall for him all over again. He knows love languages are the only way to re-enter your life. So, he will do whatever he can to make you happy. 

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19. He directly asks you to give him another chance 

Most guys don’t do this because of their fragile egos. But a man who confronts you about this is the one who knows he messed up pretty badly. He will be transparent with you and will request you to give him another chance. One way or the other, he will make sure that you give him a second chance. 

Should You Forgive Your Ex-Boyfriend When He Knows He Messed Up? 

Forgiveness is a complex emotional process that can have both personal and relational implications. Here are two main factors to consider when deciding whether to forgive your ex-boyfriend:

  • Reflect on the dynamics of your relationship and what led to the breakup. Go back in time and see things from a different perspective. Were there signs of cheating, hurtful actions, or misunderstandings? Understanding the reasons behind the breakup can help you evaluate the need for forgiveness
  • Are you open to the possibility of re-establishing a friendship or maintaining a cordial relationship with your ex-boyfriend in the future? Forgiveness can be a step towards creating a more amicable environment if you have mutual friends or shared responsibilities

Key Takeaways 

  • Some of the signs a guy knows he messed up is when he stops contacting you and starts talking good about you with others 
  • When actions speak louder than words, that’s when a man realizes he lost a good woman
  • If he wants to reconcile with you, he will improve himself and show all positive signs that he won’t hurt you again intentionally 

When he recognizes that he has made a mistake in real life and shows all the signs a guy knows he messed up, it is usually a good indication of self-awareness and responsibility. He will use this as an opportunity for personal growth. If you want to give him another chance and want to make the relationship work, then you can do so without any hesitation. If you don’t want to take him back or if you don’t feel like forgiving him, then be honest about it. But one way or the other, draw boundaries to protect yourself.